How to Master Influence Skills to Sell More Web Design Services

Selling is all about influence skills, yet few of us have learned how to apply the art and science of influence to our work. Influence is not something with which we're born. It can be learned, and there are numerous studies that have demonstrated the principles of influencing other people.

Unfortunately, much of the science of influence is couched in academic mumbo jumbo. Few entrepreneurs ever slog through research about influence or figure out how to apply it to their situation.

This article identifies a set of principles that any Web designer or developer can use to sell more projects. It then explains how to apply those principles in both marketing and selling situations. As a result, it can help you:

• Achieve your influence objectives while strengthening relationships (instead of coming across as too pushy).
• Know what you want before you go into a meeting, and plan an effective strategy to succeed.
• Be more comfortable influencing other people, so that you don't withdraw during healthy conflicts.
• Understand how to be more influential when you are in selling situations.
• Choose the conversations that are most effective in a selling situation while avoiding those that are not.

Influence Defined

Influence is the ability to proactively shift the thinking, actions, and even emotional states of other people. Influential people have a picture in their mind of how they want others to respond to them, and a high percentage of time, they are able to make that picture become real.

Twelve Powerful Principles That Will Help You Be More Influential

The following twelve principles represent some of the most powerful "rules" about influencing others. As you read them, assess your own strengths and weaknesses. Which principles already shape how you interact every day? Which of the principles do you know to be true but don't practice (and why not)? And which are new to you, "aha's" that you can put into action right away?

1. Balance Results and Relationships

   In any influence situation, you have two goals: achieve a specific result, and strengthen the relationship. Some people are too forceful when they try to influence others, so they come across as obnoxious and coercive. They might achieve results, but they damage relationships. In selling situations, this does not lead to long-term client relationships.

   Others are too meek. They avoid conflict and the possibility of hurting the relationship. They come across as passive, and rarely achieve their influence objectives. Ironically, they also hurt their business relationships, because prospects don't respect their timid style.

   It can be tricky to balance both results and relationships. Different people have a different sense of when someone is being too pushy or too passive. People who master influence are able to gauge each person's balancing point.

2. People do Things for Their Reasons, Not Yours

   To successfully influence people, you have to find reasons that matter to them. Following are two attempts to convince a co-worker to go out to Chinese Food with you for lunch. Which is more compelling?

   Example One: Joe, let's go out to Chinese Food. I'm starving and I've been craving Chinese Food for weeks.

   Example Two: Joe, let's go out to Chinese Food. You say there are no decent vegetarian restaurants around here, and the place I have in mind has over thirty vegetarian dishes. Also, they have a 15-minute lunchtime guarantee, so you'll be back in plenty of time for your afternoon meeting. Couldn't you use a little time away from the office?

   The second is more compelling, at least to Joe, because it is all about him.

   Whenever you are in an influence situation, try to use the word "you" twice as often as you use the word "I." That way, you can be sure you're focused on reasons that matter to them.

3. People Really do Things for Emotional Reasons, not Logical Ones

   Ultimately, people act for emotional reasons -- even those who seem completely analytical by nature. We all take action to experience pleasure and avoid pain. If you can show people why your ideas will help them feel pleasure and not pain, you will be successful.

   Most of us feel pleasure when we:
   

   • enjoy a sense of success
   • have more time
   • eliminate headaches and hassles
   • look good
   • feel smart
   • stay safe

   Alternatively, people will go to extreme lengths to avoid the negatives. Few of us want to:
   

   • feel like a loser
   • be harried
   • deal with frustration and struggle
   • look stupid
   • feel insecure

   Of course, different people respond differently to different emotions, so be aware.

4. People Want Things that are Scarce

   If you can give the impression that your services are exclusive, that your business is full, and that you only work with a few clients at a time, you will be more attractive to prospects. That's because people want what they can't have, especially special, unique things.

   To give a specific example, setting yourself up as a national, or international expert is a great way to create a sense of scarcity. For instance, my consulting business took off when I began to focus on an international marketplace. Suddenly, I seemed far away to many of my prospects, and that created a sense of scarcity. People started to perceive me as a highly sought-after expert, instead of as one of thousands of consultants in the local marketplace. Why not set your firm up as an international expert, and become the proverbial guru on the exotic mountaintop?

5. People Take Action when there is Urgency

   This principle ties closely to scarcity. I doubled my sales in a recent direct marketing piece simply by adding this sentence: "Order today, because prices are going up at the end of this week."

   To create urgency:
   

   • remind prospects of what they're giving up every day they don't move forward
   • share what their competition is doing and how it will hurt them
   • tell them that you are going on vacation in two weeks and need to start now so that they have a solution before you leave.

6. People are Influenced by "Social Proof"

   Social proof means that people believe respected, third party sources. They even believe sources that they don't respect, if enough of them are in agreement. That means that all of the following can help you influence other people:

   • testimonials from opinion leaders
   • case studies
   • referrals from people they know and trust
   • articles about you and quotes by you in the local paper
   • volunteer work with leaders in your target market
   • facts backed up by solid sources

7. People Listen More to Those who are Similar to Them

   To be more influential, be more like the people you want to influence. Dress like them, talk about things that they care about, show common ground and values. If they talk quickly and get to the bottom line, do the same. If they talk slowly and like to get into the details, then shift your style to be more analytical. Focus on business and the numbers if that's what they care about; focus on technology if they seem oriented that way.

8. People Listen More to People they Like

   David Maister, one of the most respected authorities on professional service firms, has determined that there are two questions people must answer affirmatively before they will hire you:

   1. Can you do the work?
   
   
   2. Do I want to work with you?

   Whether you're likeable or not goes a long way towards answering the second question -- and may even influence the first.

   It's not hard to get people to like you, and you don't have to be a "suck up" to do it. Here are 6 characteristics of likeable people:

   • They are humble.
   • They take an interest in others by asking intelligent questions and listening to the answers.
   • They have a can-do attitude.
   • They are grateful.
   • They acknowledge and validate others.
   • They empathize with others' problems and never make them feel stupid for having problems.

9. Pulling is Almost Always More Influential than Pushing

   There are two fundamental ways to influence other people: you can push, or you can pull. Pushing means that you make suggestions and tell the other person why he or she should listen to you. This works fine if you are a recognized authority with unique facts. It's a good way to convince people that what you have to say makes sense. Unfortunately, that's not enough in selling situations. Doubly unfortunate is the fact that most professionals use a push approach to sell, because they are trained to share their knowledge.

   Pulling means that you attract people to you by asking questions and understanding their needs. Pulling leads to commitment. That's because, by listening, you can shape a custom solution to fit their unique concerns and needs. Also, the other person feels like he or she is in control of the conversation, which makes them more likely to agree to move forward since the decision appears to be 100% in their hands. For these reasons, pulling is more effective in selling situation.

10. Different Types of Conversations Work Best in Different Influence Situations

    Just as you use a knife and not a spoon to cut a loaf of bread, so you need to choose the right type of influence conversation for each unique situation. Researchers have found that there are a handful of types of influence conversations that get results (using logic and facts, asserting, negotiating, asking and listening, and sharing a vision for the future) but that for each situation, there is one optimal type of conversation to use.

    Unfortunately, the same researchers found that most of us use only one type of conversation over and over again. For instance, many of us only use logic and facts to make a point. Like a broken clock that tells the right time twice every day, we occasionally get results in this way -- but not nearly as often as we could if we better adapted our conversations to the situation at hand.

    Later on, this article will show you the exact flow a selling conversation should take to effectively influence your prospects. Hint: asking questions and listening makes up a key part of that conversation!

11. Follow the Rule of Three

    You will be much more effective if you make no more than three points, or give no more than three reasons. People can't absorb more than that, especially in conversations.

    Yet too many professionals blab on and on, until the other person loses interest.

    Be clear and concise.

12. Stand on Equal Ground with the Person you want to Influence

    Finally, you are more influential when you stand as an equal with the person you want to influence. In selling situations, this means that you are a busy, successful professional -- not a vendor desperate for business. You are entitled to ask probing questions, take time to assess a situation, agree on a time line with deadlines, fit the prospect into your schedule, and push back if the prospect seems to be on the wrong track or has not given you accurate information.

    If a prospect does not give you what you need, then you have every right to say, "Listen, you don't seem to be taking this seriously. Do you want me to solve your problem or not?"

    If you stand on equal ground, your prospects will respect you more. You will therefore be more attractive to them, and also more influential.